I think to tell her to tell him to ask them, "Why are you so angry?" Or maybe mad. What is the third grade word for what could you have been through in your little life to make you punch me?
Mad.
"Why are you so mad? I was just walking to class. I said, 'Hi.' And I don't want you to read into this that I just assume something about you, but I think maybe something happened for you to hate on me. I'm a likable guy. What did I ever do?"
Does the kid get pummelled?
Or does the pummeller become so shocked to hear such calm confidence in a voice that he pauses?
And in that space of Did he just call me mad? Should I be offended by that word? Is he right? How does this look? The guys are right here. I can't back down. I gotta show him he can't talk to me that way. Likable?
What is that? Five seconds?
Five seconds the pummelled has to make eye contact and calmly and softly say,
"Listen, man.
Tell me what you need.
It hurts when you do that to me."
Or run like the wind. Whatdoeshedo?
What does the pummeller do?
Space.
"Listen. You seem like you could be a cool guy. Me, too. My brother thinks I'm the coolest guy on earth. Since we're both cool, let's just be friends."*
Today I am especially grateful for my parents.
*I'm old enough to use cool, and I don't really know what kids use these days. And I definitely don't know how to tell someone how they should parent their sensitive and loving and truly kind child but I will write only here that someone taught me in a tale of ancient times that there is value in the space of a question.
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