Thursday, November 5, 2015

and there she sits

She was waylaid by a life of worry. Will the plane crash? Is he going to be alright? Did I study enough? How did I do on that test?  Does he like me? Does she like me? Where are we going? What are we doing? Am I doing the right thing? Is everybody going to be happy?

The best thing I heard all week is, "You're not as powerful as you think."

Is it crazy that I plan to tell an eleven year old that tonight?
Should I take her to a movie or out for dinner?
Should I just back off and let her be?
Should I consider that maybe, at least partly, I gave that kid a migraine?

Maybe we just need to take a walk around a track or on some streets. Maybe I'll just tell her that someone I love said something beautiful this week. You're not as powerful as you think. You just need to be whatever you want, wherever your heart leads. Stop stressing, chic. Everyone around you is fine. And then I'll tell her about the calendar years ago, and how I still remember it.

I think it said, "You're not Atlas carrying the world on your shoulders. It will go on with or without you."

And then I thought, "Just take care of yourself, freak."

That's when she'll laugh and say, "Did anyone ever tell you that you talk too much?"

"Yep, they have. You have. I tell myself that all the time."

Today I am grateful for powerlessness. I am grateful for the woman who said it to me.

Hello, breath. I forgot about you. I forgot where we were. What's that Ben Howard song?


Anonymous said...

Dude, you got some headphones?

Shea Goff said...

No headphones. I apologize if I'm playing my music too loud for you. I'll turn it down.