Monday, September 3, 2012

no animals (that I know of) were harmed for this writing

Wildlife found at the Farmer's Market in Meridian, MS

I am tempted to tell him he would never understand but then realize it could be me without the ability. In all likelihood it would be that both of us are too caught up in our own movies to even spend an afternoon matinee on the other's. It doesn't keep either of us from claiming feature of the week, a did you see that Oscar winning performance, what you didn't go, dude. my movie was much more interesting than your's, hands on the hips, head tilted to the right, are you not watching my movie? exclamation point.

My movie was a National Geographic reality life or death fear of blood splatter what in the hell edge of your seat throw your popcorn in the air spill your drink on the guy next to you cinematic masterpiece. All I did was walk out the back door, took a look at the two horses then a looked at what they were looking at. They were watching a deer being chased by a coyote in the middle of the afternoon. I wish I could tell you it was one of those playful moments where it seemed that somehow a baby coyote cub had obviously become friends with a small fawn and his little bunny rabbit buddy because of how now as adults they jauntily played chase in my backyard. This, my friend, was not the case. The deer was running for his life and maintaining a consistent and safe distance from it's aggressor but the aggressor wasn't giving up so I did what any rational human being would do. I screamed, Stop it, coyote. Don't do that. Stop, coyote. Stop now. Screamed. Yelled.  Most likely interrupted a couple of dove hunts in the area. Acted all powerful like I could intervene with my instructions. Looking back now I especially like that I would have thought the coyote would recognize his English name spoken with a solid southern accent. He is from these parts.

It wasn't long before the deer hit the woods with the coyote still behind him. One of those choose your own ending things which I always like better than someone surely dies. (though at the time I wouldn't have minded a twist where the deer turned around and kicked the coyote's ass). At that point I looked back at the horses. They were staring at me. I figured one of 'em said to the other, She just totally got put on the list of stupid animals for which that coyote will return. Dude. what an idiot.

Today I am grateful to not listen seriously to the horses' radio podcast, Pasture Ponderings.

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