I'll admit it. I get a little cranky, a tab bit morose, slightly sad (read: major depression, lose my appetite for most anything) when life doesn't go as I plan. Or wait, planning is not exactly my strong suit (read: I don't plan). If we are going to be honest here then I will have to say that when I jump off a cliff with a running start while all my friends and family go, Wait. No. You need wings, I respond with, Just do what you believe, and then I flap my arms.
And then I hurt myself a little bit. And then I get all pouty and sad 'cause I didn't listen and I know it's my fault. So I spend about a week like that, and I hate the writing 'cause it's so dark and why would I ever want to give that to the world. Who needs more dark? Don't we have enough? Then I feel guilty and it's this crazy shit cycle of meh, bleh, and all that. It becomes a theme because of the way I look at things.
Prime example is Monday morning I couldn't write. Nothing. Stone cold silence. Not even the chirp of a cricket. I finally gave up, told myself I had the entire day and did the thing I do every morning by going to check Seth's blog. He was promoting his upcoming book on Kickstarter. This is it, I told myself. Seth is even having to create a Kickstarter page to publish a book. Why would Seth need to prove to a publisher he could publish a book? He's a genius. He's published bestsellers. (read: Josh makes fun of me by calling him Prophet Seth and I once dreamed Seth came to my birthday party and ignored me and still I was excited).
The world is ending, the collapse is here. meh, bleh and all that.
Seth funded his book in three hours. Sweeeet. (if you'd like to help there are still some nice prizes)
Then I got a little pick-me-up. Dad's coming with his truck, and I can't even begin to explain how that helps.
Today I am grateful for the cavalry.