|Josh by Josh|
Step one. Stare into a blank space.
Step two. Blink five thousand three hundred eighty-two times.
Step three. Try not to blink.
Step four. Get frustrated that you didn't turn on the dishwasher last night. It's sound is drowning out your music.
Step five. Reject at least nine of your ideas. Don't be sweet. Punish yourself. They were idiotic.
Step six. Go to a mirror to stare at yourself disapprovingly.
Step seven. Check your teeth. Commit to a rigid exercise program. Laugh.
Step eight. Read this Hunter S Thompson article and decide to buy a can of Mace. (thank you, Adam)
Step nine. Check your bank account. You can't afford the Mace. Embrace the envy.
Step ten. Tell yourself it's okay. Maybe tomorrow.
Today I am grateful for this space.